Saturday, August 04, 2007

I'm back

And I've been back since last Thursday. And the past week has been hard, harder than I thought it would be.

There are moments when I'm so glad to be back. To have the ability to take a shower, lay in the ac, check email, etc...these are things to be grateful for. However, in the same breath, I miss Kenya. I miss tusker, samosas, and chapati. I miss Bri like crazy. I miss Jen, Josie, Jodi, Joolee and Sarah...I almost feel like I knew who I was more while I was in Kenya.

Here's what I realized about me:
  • There are still people I think about, whether I want to or not. In fact, I had a dream about one of them, a dream that was pretty significant, however I can't share it with her. She hasn't pursued me in over a year, why the hell should I tell her about it.
  • That my job is something I need/want to settle in the near future (defining near future is harder than I thought). Is it time to change or to realize that my job is providing the means for the life I really want.
  • That I'm grateful for the life I have and the life I want.
But, life continues on. I go to concerts (I saw Ryan Adams' last night and loved every minute of it), I get haircuts, I take naps.

And I laugh:

But until things settle down, be prepared for the scattered.

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