Times, they are a changin'

Perhaps I should catch the few readers still on here up on what's happening.

At the end of February, my intuition was proven right. I was laid off...again.

Not going to lie, I fully expected the company to go under in just six weeks. (Un)Fortunately, it is still going strong. So, I interviewed, I waited, and finally, after just two months, I accepted a new position. With a different catering company, where I would be doing more operational things for events. I saw it as an opportunity to grow.

Unfortunately, it has not been the best choice. I didn't realize I'd be sacrificing my weekends, my soul for something I wasn't 100% about.

And then things changed.

And I would like to call it divine.

I was approached by a NPO to come on their staff. They approached me with an opportunity of a lifetime. That after all the time I've put in the last two years, finally, I am making the transition towards what I want to be doing long term.

So, after only two months, I've put in my two weeks noticed. And I'm super excited about what's ahead of me. But that's not the only thing that's changed.

I found a rhythm at the gym. I do zumba...and the elliptical...and weights. I'm noticing the change in my body. I'm starting to lose weight (I am currently down 15 pounds since starting at the end of April) and find some confidence that has been tucked far away.

So, while I may not be blogging, I'm still here. Making transitions, being content and really excited about what's next.

Fearful

I am almost always stressed out. Life, in general stresses me out. In recent years, this has been attributed to my job. In 2009, in case your memory has failed you, I lost my well-paying, high-stressed job. In reflection, it was a blessing; in the moment, it was stirring up every possible fear about myself. And that entire year, I considered myself a failure.

I did get a job towards the end of the year. I took the job because it was something I was interested in, but not something I was passionate about. Some days, I know I took this job to take a job. Being unemployed for 11 months will do that to you.

However, due to some recent events, I am now fearful again of losing my job. I'm hoping by saying out loud that I don't want to lose my job will, somehow, make it true. I am good at my job. I've been very successful at my job. However, doing my line of work, in the industry I am in, is one where people see it as an extra, not a necessity. Mentally, emotionally, financially, I can't afford to lose my job.

So, universe, I'm putting it out there...either help me with this one or find me a new one...I can't keep living in fear.