Courage is something I don't think most people are born with. And if you are born with courage, at some point, you lose it.
My friend J recently posted a blog on his experience in living in Denver. Why he came, what happened once he arrived, where he sees himself going. That takes courage. Especially because some people will deny what his experience was like or that they have any part in his pain.
However, while I know that my story is so similar to J's, the part that causes me to get is angry is when people leave in the midst of the pain. People saw J, myself, others in the midst of the pain and they did nothing. No, that's not true, the contributed more pain. Instead of sitting in the pain, in the midst of feeling crazy, they convinced me that I was crazy. They refused to hear the other side of the story. Because it was too painful for them.
While I wish I had the courage to call these people out and let them know that I don't understand why after years of relationship building how they can walk away. That when I trusted them with my soul, they decided to piss all over it.
So until I can muster up the courage to tell these people what happened through my eyes, I'm grateful for the 3 people who have stuck by me through it all. I love you each dearly...DW, Sara, and J. You each make my days brighter.